Hot!Friday Funnies

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Badger
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/06/04 05:34:50 (permalink)
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Thanks to C&C's son Ted for this one.
 


Wag more....bark less.
CallMeFrank
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/06/08 00:04:45 (permalink)
+1 (1)
To Shoot or Not Shoot
 

A man returns home a day early from a business trip. It's after midnight.While en-route home, he asks the cabby if he would be a witness.  The man suspects his wife is having an affair, and he wants to catch her in the act. For $100, the cabby agrees.
 
Quietly arriving home, the husband and cabby tip toe into the bedroom.  The husband switches on the lights, yanks the blanket back and there is his wife, naked, with a man.  The husband puts a gun to the naked man's head.
 
The wife shouts, 'Don't do it! I lied when I told you I inherited money'.  HE paid for the Porsche I gave you.
HE paid for your new 25 ft. Ranger Fishing Boat .
HE paid for your Packer season tickets.
HE paid for our house at the lake.
HE paid for your Golf Trip to St Andrews and your new 4 x 4.
HE paid for our country club membership and HE even pays the monthly dues!'
 
Shaking his head from side-to-side, the husband lowers the gun. He looksover at the cabby and says, 'What would you do'?
 
The cabby replies, 'I'd cover him with that blanket before he catches a cold.'



 
CallMeFrank
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/06/17 12:13:54 (permalink)
+1 (1)
Things I learned from my mom and dad: 
 
 
  1. My mother  taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL   DONE.  
            
          "If you're going to kill  each other, do it outside. I just finished  cleaning."  
            
          2. My mother  taught me RELIGION.  
            
          "You better pray that  will come out of the carpet."  
            
          3. My father  taught me about TIME TRAVEL.  
            
          "If you don't straighten  up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next  week!"  
            
          4. My father  taught me LOGIC.  
            
          " Because I said so,  that's why ."  
            
          5. My mother  taught me MORE LOGIC .  
            
          "If you fall out of that  swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with  me."  
            
          6. My mother  taught me FORESIGHT.  
            
          "Make sure you wear  clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."  
            
          7. My father  taught me IRONY.  
            
          "Keep crying, and I'll  give you something to cry about."  
            
          8. My mother  taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.  
            
          "Shut your mouth and eat  your supper."  
            
          9. My mother  taught me about CONTORTIONISM.  
            
          "Just you look at that  dirt on the back of your neck!"  
            
          10. My mother  taught me about STAMINA.  
            
          "You'll sit there until  all that spinach is gone."  
            
          11. My mother  taught me about WEATHER.  
            
          "This room of yours  looks as if a tornado went through it."  
            
          12. My mother  taught me about HYPOCRISY.  
            
          "If I told you once,  I've told you a million times, don't exaggerate!"  
            
          13. My father  taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.  
            
          "I brought you into this  world, and I can take you out..."  
            
          14. My mother  taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION .  
            
          "Stop acting like your  father!"  
            
          15. My mother  taught me about ENVY.  
            
          "There are millions of  less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful  parents like you do."  
            
          16. My mother  taught me about ANTICIPATION.  
            
          "Just wait until we get  home."  
            
          17. My mother  taught me about RECEIVING.  
            
          "You are going to get it  from your father when you get home!"  
            
          18 . My mother taught  me MEDICAL SCIENCE.  
            
          "If you don't stop  crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that  way."  
            
          19. My mother  taught me ESP.  
            
          "Put your sweater on;  don't you think I know when you are cold?"  
            
          20. My father  taught me HUMOR.  
            
          "When that lawn mower  cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."  
            
          21. My mother  taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.  
            
          "If you don't eat your  vegetables, you'll never grow up."  
            
          22. My mother  taught me GENETICS.  
            
          "You're just like your  father."  
            
          23. My mother  taught me about my ROOTS.  
            
          "Shut that door behind  you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"  
            
          24. My mother  taught me WISDOM.  
            
          "When you get to be my  age, you'll understand.  
            
          25. My father  taught me about JUSTICE .  
            
          "One day you'll have  kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"  
            
Mayan Boar
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/06/17 19:40:01 (permalink)
+1 (1)
Ain't that the truth.  Funny. MB


movie fan
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/06/29 11:11:33 (permalink)
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it aint Friday, but I,ve missed a few.  So....
 


 
 
The only easy day was Yesterday
movie fan
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/06/29 11:14:29 (permalink)
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and 1 more....
 
 


 
 
The only easy day was Yesterday
Badger
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/07/15 05:37:50 (permalink)
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Wag more....bark less.
CallMeFrank
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/07/15 06:19:55 (permalink)
+1 (1)
Badger--You're training him well!  #1 rule--when drowning, shred as many clothes as possible.
LaLuz
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/07/19 12:11:16 (permalink)
+1 (1)
Badger,
The beach area looks like Akumal.
If so, would you think the pup is available for hire for a week or so?
The owners might consider an ad on LG.

It wouldn't take much for me to up and run....
To another life.............somewhere in the sun.
K. Chesney
Badger
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/07/22 04:58:09 (permalink)
+3 (3)
Hey LaLuz, great idea! Could be a way for me to make some $$ while on vacation.
 
Speaking of the beach...
 

 
 

Wag more....bark less.
Badger
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/07/29 05:00:18 (permalink)
+2 (2)
Photo taken 3 days ago near Duluth, Mn. during a brief heatwave.
 


Wag more....bark less.
crunch
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/07/29 06:37:11 (permalink)
+1 (1)
LOL!

 



 

Nothing wrong with me that a margarita on the beach wouldn't fix.......................
Mayan Boar
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/07/29 20:16:47 (permalink)
+1 (1)
Badger, saw that on FB.  Everyone/thing needs a break!  Love that photo. 


LaLuz
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/07/30 18:27:19 (permalink)
+1 (1)
Now that is one smart bear!!!
And......if you listen carefully........you can hear it softly singing.....
 
"Look for the bare necessities
The simple bare necessities
Forget about your worries and your strife
I mean the bare necessities
Old Mother Nature's recipes
That brings the bare necessities of life
 
Wherever I wander, wherever I roam
I couldn't be fonder of my big home
The bees are buzzin' in the tree
To make some honey just for me
When you look under the rocks and plants
And take a glance at the fancy ants
Then maybe try a few.......
 
The bare necessities of life will come to you
They'll come to you!
 
Look for the bare necessities
The simple bare necessities
Forget about you worries and your strife
I mean the bare necessities
That's why a bear can rest at ease
With just the bare necessities of life."
 
Well I guess if it can't be your time at the beach in Akumal,
This works just fine............Perhaps we complicate things too much....ya think?
 
...La Luz
post edited by LaLuz - 2016/08/01 11:41:42

It wouldn't take much for me to up and run....
To another life.............somewhere in the sun.
K. Chesney
Mayan Boar
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/07/30 19:46:06 (permalink)
+1 (1)



Badger
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/08/01 05:02:33 (permalink)
+1 (1)
Laluz, perfect!!!

Wag more....bark less.
Badger
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/08/05 05:38:30 (permalink)
0


Wag more....bark less.
crunch
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/08/05 06:37:43 (permalink)
+1 (1)
Bath time!  How do i get myeslf into these messes?

 



 

Nothing wrong with me that a margarita on the beach wouldn't fix.......................
ChrisandCindy
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/08/05 08:45:04 (permalink)
+1 (1)
what is the smallest bit of dog you can find laying around at our house?
 

 
wait for it
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
a mollie cule

Video
Pix
YouTube



A smile is the same in every language
crunch
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/08/05 12:55:52 (permalink)
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LOL!

 



 

Nothing wrong with me that a margarita on the beach wouldn't fix.......................
movie fan
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/08/07 15:29:21 (permalink)
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Air Show Disaster                                            
AIRCRAFT HITS FOUR BUILDINGS  

This is tough to see.
 
It just shows the dangers of attending these events.
A
 
mazing photo below shows great detail. 

 
The pilot at low level had no control over his aircraft. 
 
 
It narrowly misses a crowd gathered for the air show and slams into four buildings.  

 
One can only imagine the horror of the occupants inside those buildings. 

 
No one was killed, but it probably scared the **** out of them.
 
 
 
 
 
 


 
 
The only easy day was Yesterday
LaLuz
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/08/08 16:06:24 (permalink)
+1 (1)
Badger
 




"Splish, splash, I was takin' a bath
Long about a Saturday night, yeah
A rub, dub, just relaxin in the tub
Thinking everythin' was alright......"        ( Bobby Darin )
 
                 -----------------
               
..........Oh.....you're home early tonight.
Would you mind hitting the rinse cycle"......I need to get the soap off.
 
What do you mean this isn't the tub?
........Then.....this isn't soap either?


It wouldn't take much for me to up and run....
To another life.............somewhere in the sun.
K. Chesney
CallMeFrank
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/08/12 06:04:55 (permalink)
+1 (1)
 

 

 
Badger
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/08/12 16:01:49 (permalink)
+1 (1)


Wag more....bark less.
Badger
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Re: Friday Funnies 2016/08/19 05:01:45 (permalink)
0


Wag more....bark less.
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